
Self-care, self-care, self-care. Everybody talks about it, but do you really understand what it is and when to use it? If you aren’t careful, you might use self-care to fill a hole in your heart which won’t rejuvenate and restore your sense of well being. This is called emotional numbing.
When done right, caring for yourself can lift your vibrations. It can bring more positivity and goodness into your life and refresh your soul.
As you restore your positive energy, you are able to function on a much higher level- resulting in a much more productive and meaningful day.
However, no amount of exercise, bubble baths, connecting with friends, scrolling through social media for entertainment, etc, will ever be self-care if it is being used to AVOID or fill a void within yourself.
True Self-Care Should Rejuvenate You. Emotional Numbing Leaves You Feeling Empty.
The key is to remember that self-care is meant to revitalize. For it to be really effective, you need to recognize when self-care turns into numbing.
When you are feeling anxious, angry, sad, ashamed, etc, it is much harder to think positively. This is because human brains are made for survival. When your brain is functioning in survival mode, it is very difficult to get out of black and white thinking to access creativity.
You Need to Feed Your Soul What it is Craving Instead of Numbing the Emotions
In order to tell the difference between true self-care, and numbing, you have to dig deep into what your soul is craving in any given moment. Take a minute to close your eyes, tap on your chest, and ask yourself “what do I want right now?” Follow your wants.
However, if you find that your cup feels empty after doing something that seemed like it would satisfy your want, it’s a good sign that you may be numbing. A good example of this is that when you are craving connection, you might look to social media to fill this desire.
However, after scrolling through your feed, you might still feel sort of empty inside. Perhaps a better self-care choice for this want would be to make plans with a friend or to call someone up. If you want more ideas on self-care to partake in, check out my post on the self-care kit you need in your life.
Here are 5 Signs You May Be Engaged in Emotional Numbing

1. You Don’t Feel Satisfied Emotionally and Need More to Numb Unwanted Feelings
If you don’t feel refreshed, happy, and restored afterward your self-care, then it is a good sign you might be numbing.
When your self-care doesn’t satisfy you, the goal post always moves. You say “I’ll be happy when…”. You keep chasing happiness but never seem to have a moment to let the joy of it actually sink in.
2. You Do It to Numb Your Emotions and to Feel Better About Yourself
If you’re doing self-care to feel better about yourself, it may not actually be self-care. Self-betterment is a great thing, but it’s important to be confident in who you are right now.
There’s a difference between going for a run because it feels good and you want to take good care of your body, and going for a run because you feel fat and ugly and don’t believe you can be happy without going for a run.
3. You Don’t Feel Motivated When You Are Done
Self-care should restore your energy and make it easier to tackle life’s challenges. You probably need to find an activity that recharges you more if you still don’t feel motivated after your self-care.
Identify and release energetic blockages, self-doubts, and limiting beliefs by using The Spiritual Self-Care Planner, where you can list out self-care barriers and how to address them.
4. You Feel Numb, Distant, and Detached From Yourself or Others
If you are feeling distant, it’s a good sign that you are not vibrating at your highest level. Self-care restores your energy. It should help you feel more connected to yourself and confident in who you are.
As you feel confident in who you are, it becomes easier to connect with others.
5. You Have a Hard Time Pulling Yourself Away From Whatever You Are Using for Emotional Numbing
If you are having a hard time pulling yourself away from something, it is a good sign that your brain might be obsessing over it, rather than being present and enjoying the experience.
This is the difference between living in survival mode and living in alignment. If you’re feeling compelled to do something, it may be time to try self-care that will actually clear your mind and put you into a more joyful state of being.
If you find that you are numbing, try going back to the drawing board. Ask yourself what you want right now. Then, find a form of self-care that truly restores your energy, your confidence, and helps you feel at peace.
One form of self care that I have found to help restore my motivation, creativity and confidence is a social media detox. I created a 10 Day Detox Challenge to help you refresh. Get started today!

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